Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize