I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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