More tranny stories later!
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
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