I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
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