I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Randomize
