Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
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