just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Randomize
