I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
you have to choose: penises or morals?
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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