Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Randomize
