Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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