i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Randomize
