New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
