are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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