Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
