If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
My pussy is not your playground.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
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