just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
I had to cum in my sink.
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