How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize