he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
