Tell her she can't have a vagina
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Randomize
