It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize