Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
