id be glad to
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
Randomize
