she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
