I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
Randomize
