She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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