There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
kristin has been a bad kristin
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Randomize
