She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
