This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize