Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
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