Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Randomize
