the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
