Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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