Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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