so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Randomize
