wanna go halves on a baby?
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Randomize