i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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