On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
Its about making memories worth repressing
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize