she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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