some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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