Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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