you guys were way drunker than both of me
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
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