just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
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