Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
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