PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Pants 0. Shit 1.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Randomize
