I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
So squirting runs in the family.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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