good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
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