is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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