Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
