Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
