VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
